“Members of the Church would be surprised at the shocking number of people who have met their spouses [online].
It’s a place where singles can go and meet other singles without pressure from their ward members or families constantly telling them to get married.”The Profile Want to date online but don’t want a picture on your profile?
“It is becoming increasingly difficult for LDS people to meet a potential spouse once they’re out of college,” says Alisa Snell, a dating coach and marriage and family therapist in Utah.
“You’re just not in front of the masses, which translates to fewer opportunities.”Holly Coleman, 36, can’t argue there.“You get to the point—especially in my age group—when you feel like you’ve met every eligible person in your circles,” says Coleman, who met her husband on e Harmony and married him in 2011.
“People tend to search for who is new to the site.”The Safety Net When you set a time to meet, shout it from the rooftops (but not your identifiable rooftop).“Meet in a public place, and don’t share addresses with each other,” Snell says.
“Tell a few people where you’re going and what time you expect to be home.”And that phone number you give out?
“You can’t be careful enough about this in the beginning.”When it comes to giving out names, keep it short—as in first names only.“Someone with sincere intentions won’t have a problem with that,” Snell says.
“If a person keeps on pressing you for specific information, that’s a big warning sign.”If you’re a single parent, keep those kids a mystery (with the exception of their actual existence).“Your profile will typically say whether or not you have kids, but beyond that, don’t go into details about your children until you’re in an actual relationship,” Snell says.
“Also, don’t post pictures of your kids on your profile.”If the conversation rapidly turns intimate or inappropriate, nix the contact just as quickly.“When people want to meet immediately or late at night, that’s a big red flag.
Here are 20 points—broken up into four categories—that will tell you virtually everything you need to know.
The Pros Where have all the good men (and women) gone?